cindylynnwho's Journal, 15 Sep 22

I feel ya! I’m noticing extra neck skin now. I’ve always said I’d never dye my hair and I don’t wear makeup so we’ll see what the future holds😂 my hubby will always be older, yours too. So you’ll always look younger when your with him 

I joke around, but to be serious for one second, this is a real thing for me. I remember once in my early 30s I was at a wedding and my girlfriends thought I hadn't applied enough makeup. They had good intentions, but makeup and physical beauty are not what make you beautiful. Society agreed that makeup was something women do, but it is arbitrary. We made it up. All the men in the wedding photos looked great without makeup. It is important to feel good about yourself, but let's remember that we're making it all up. Beauty is really self-love. Self-loathing is the opppsite. Be someone you love.  

Golfmarina attitude is everything! And hair and makeup help too  

Shake those pounds that’s true. I too have resisted makeup though I wear a little these days. Only have dyed my hair once in college. I don’t think I would do it again, but we’ll see  

Gwzfire at my first wedding my bridesmaids surprised me by having my makeup done for me. The stylist got my coloration all wrong and applied it too heavily. She said “but it will look good in pictures.” I cried and said I wanted it to look good in real life. I took it all off and reapplied a more natural look, which was lighter than what most of the maids were wearing. I felt bad about rejecting the gift, but had to feel like myself. Anyway, your point hits home about makeup and beauty being made up constructs. I have to remember that even if other people judge me because my face is aging, I don’t have to. I can still love myself. Why stop now because I’m going through a natural aging process that we all go through that I don’t even think is unattractive in other people? I will remember your thoughts, so thank you  

cindylynnwho, honest engine, I will be striving to follow my own advice right along with you. It never ceases to amaze me that so many of us 'know' something but ignore our own experience and wisdom and trade it in for the ideas others hold, or worse, society's ideas.  

Absolutely gwzfire. I definitely “know better” but have been having a hard time lately. I really appreciate you and everyone else who posted for giving me space to vent about my neuroses. This is not my usual character here but glad I have FS friends who can both give me beauty tips and remind me of what’s really important in life instead.  

Thank you gwz and Cindy. Your whole conversation rings very true. I dont need to follow societies expectations for beauty.  

True shake those pounds! Glad my #firstworldproblems vent could lead to a healthy discussion that benefitted you as well  

Shake, yes! We can decide that the goal is strength and health. The rest will follow. All my messages sent with love as the leading energy. Never judgement. Never.