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Food
Smoothie
tea with soymilk
Zucchini grillini and grilled veggies from Jason's deli
diet coke
leftover smoothie
2 ezekiel toast w margarine
1 scoop soy ice cream
1Tbs peanut butter
handful potato chips
Gratitude
reaching my new goal weight (5 lbs) in exactly one month
skyping with my sister
books
Carl Jung
the stuffed toy burrowing owl my dad gave me that I keep by my bed
picking up some sale items at Walmart yesterday -making the best of it after being stood up by a client
rest
a little extra income coming in this week
making progress on my presentatiom for next week (a little!)
self-forgivemess
learning to detach when needed
I had an essentially good day with some stressful points. I work with people with mental illness, addictions, and minor problems with the law. One of my clients is making devastating choices and may die soon if she continues on this path. I would never disclose specifics, but suffice it to say that my job is sressful and some of my clients make choices or end up in situations that are extremely hard to watch. I also got stood up today... and yesterday by other clients who got confused or left a message at the wrong number that they couldn't make it. Which is so frustrating when I am struggling with a enormous caseload and trying to fill so many different needs at once to get everything done- and then I waste all that time and gas for nothing.
I got home and my husband had a mini mental health crisis/fight with me, and it was really upsetting. he used to have poor mental health and is better now, and the last thing I need (or he needs!) is any flashes from the past in that regard. I was really upset and called my sister to feel better and ended up skyping with her for hours. This is my extremely long way of telling you that I didn't exercise at all today and I feel sad about that. I was going to do my 25 minute run today, the last one of week 7 of couch to 5k. I could do it tomorrow, but I have so much to do this weekend and I would normally walk tomorrow.... ahhh, I gotta be easier on myself. You win some, you lose some. Everybody makes mistakes. I will run tomorrow and let go of the loss of the walk, unless I feel super energetic tomorrow!I have a lot of homework to do, though, and I have plans with family and also with friends, and I have to get a bday present for my dad and finish my work presentation, since I know I will not be able to finish it in time during the workweek and still help clients in a timely manner. okay, I'm feeling sorry for myself a little. Maybe that's a sign I need to cancel something. I am feeling a little overwhelmed but I am making a point to be grateful. My gratitude list was blank earlier - totally not like me, but I am coming up with things for it, now. Thanks, Johanne, for creating a challenge in which we make gratitude lists. Such a wonderful idea. I may continue with it!
My friend/co-worker was kindof hitting on me today. He wasn't being gross but it was a little too much and I felt uncomfortable. At the same time, I take this flirtation as a positive sign that my efforts to be strong and healthy are showing and that this is a good weight for me to stay at. A lot of people at work have lost or are losing weight and we were making jokes about how many people we've lost between us! I think part of why they used to comment so much on how I was too skinny is cause I lost my extra weight first and they were jealous ;)
I think my journal is getting too juicy and I should change the settings so only buddies can see it. By the time you read this I probably will have done that so you should feel special that you can still see it. :) Have a wonderful, wonderful day, buddies! May you have tons to be grateful for!
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58.8 kg
Lost so far: 2.4 kg.
Still to go: 0 kg.
Diet followed: Reasonably Well.
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steady weight
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