8hunter6's Journal, 25 May 16

well... I was talking to a friend as she is trying to quit smoking and making life style changes... so i told her what I do to try my best with smoking and I told her about my endeavor to lose weight.... I said I had lost 45 pounds since January and showed her a picture as proof saying if she really was serious about changing her habbits, I could tell her what worked for me......... she then stopped talking to me.... I understand people get busy... but i also know her... I think I was right with my original plan to not talk about this to anyone "close" to me..... guess it's my fault for expecting a different reaction from a friend of 18 years.

View Diet Calendar, 25 May 2016:
399 kcal Fat: 27.69g | Prot: 19.74g | Carbs: 13.67g.   Breakfast: Coffee (Brewed From Grounds), Land O'Lakes Heavy Whipping Cream, Raspberries, Wholly Guacamole Wholly Guacamole Minis, Daisy Sour Cream, Private Selection Freestone Peach & Mango Salsa, Ground Beef (90% Lean / 10% Fat). more...

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Comments 
Hunter what do you do to stop smoking?? Tell me your secret!! Btw, I missed you on here! Keep the posts coming!! 
25 May 16 by member: smartygirlCA
Nobody wants you to change. Human nature. Just like you can't keep hanging with the party people and kick... #mojomoma #hotlibrariarian #wtfe 
25 May 16 by member: jimmiepop
I vape when I can't stand not smoking. not that big of a secret lol I fall back sometimes but i never quit quitting 
25 May 16 by member: 8hunter6
I missed everyone too... not even sure why I backed off for a bit.  
25 May 16 by member: 8hunter6
ya... I went through the same thing when I quit drinking too now that I look back.. lol what's wtfe mean??  
25 May 16 by member: 8hunter6
I have my own personal take on people who talk about wanting to change. There are those that talk about it to their friends and people and then there are those who just do it. If someone is serious about wanting to change, they just do it. They may talk to people in support groups like this along the way but not their friends and family, the do it because they personally want it. It the separation between those who are the doers and the talkers.  
25 May 16 by member: skydiverjim
Maybe she just wanted to tell you about the changes she wants to make and wasn't looking for per se advice? Sometimes people just want a lending ear.  
25 May 16 by member: Engeland
A lot of people talk the talk but don't walk the walk.  
25 May 16 by member: rhondagrimes
you may have inadvertently confronted her lack of willingness to change.  
25 May 16 by member: bellcurvz
@8H what the frick ever 
25 May 16 by member: jimmiepop
Agree with Bell. Given some time to process all that you offered, perhaps she'll come around. Long term relationships sure have their ups and downs, don't they? 
25 May 16 by member: Becca P
Some people need their problems: Present a possible solution and they'll run. They've become dependent on their drama. #sendthemtojimmiepop, #donttheyknowitsgrindtime 
25 May 16 by member: Five-Two Cowboy
First, similar to what others have said, I think many want to lose weight but when faced with the actual WORK of it, it can seem overwhelming - which may be how she felt. Did you ever notice that diet books always start with a sales job on the diet and benefits of losing weight and maybe 100 pages later actually show the diet plan? Second, it could be something completely unrelated to you that has caused her appear to retreat.  
25 May 16 by member: trackin64
I tried the vape thing for a month. It was worse than smoking as I had even MORE nicotine. So I said screw it and COMPLETELY STOPED. I just dropped the cigs and never looked back. I didn't feel like dying younger than I already will. 
25 May 16 by member: knuckles the mgtow monk
Everyone wants to know what you are doing but when they find out it is work then they quickly find a reason not to do it or be interested.  
25 May 16 by member: jparlett
Exactly, the question I ask, is does she have a weight problem? People are fickle often about how others better themselves. I remember at the school where I taught,"school girl", "school boy"! It wasn't cool to get good grades. "Put downs" we had monitor, and react to. Look what works in elections, "put downs", obviously engrained in our culture. 
25 May 16 by member: warrenwinter
I believe a lot of people want to be told that everything is fine and that they shouldn't worry about their addictive behavior, be it food or diet. If you had told her not to worry about it you wouldn't have beena good friend. You were a good friend whether she realized it or not. I list a friend for 8 years once because I told him he was making a wrong decision. After the divorce he told me I was the only one who told him it was a mistake before the marriage. Everyone else apparently told him they knew it was a mistake to marry her after the divorce. sadly we rarely speak. It's a shame.  
25 May 16 by member: northernmusician
If anyone asks me how I've lost weight, I tell them. How they take it and what they do with the info is up to them.  
25 May 16 by member: Rckc
It's hard on you, but you did what you felt was right. Maybe she is in denial, or maybe she just didn't want advice. I'm sure you know how emotionally-charged these struggles can be. Keep the faith. 
25 May 16 by member: 88elizabethcady88
from my experience, people have a real hard time with change and when you change and they dont, it just bring to light all their weakness/issues. She may not want to talk about it bc she doesnt want to have to actually do something about it. Dont take it personal bc its def her and not you.  
25 May 16 by member: redgirl1974

     
 

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