|
An Insomniac's Confession of His Past Life
I can't say I hated being ... erm ... fat. Why try to be delicate. I'm not that kind of guy. In fact, I liked it, or rather, I liked eating whatever, whenever - constantly.
I was a Coca-Cola, chocolate bar, corn chip addict. I still am, truth be told, but I am in recovery. Do I slip from time to time? Sure. But I pick myself up, dust myself off, and get back in the fight. It's the getting up that counts.
Why did I change? I mean, I used to go down and buy a twix bar for me and the wife to share. Nothing wrong with half a twix bar, right? Right. It was the 3 chocolate bars and the bag of chips stuffed in the sleeve of my jacket that I had carefully removed in the porch to keep all the foil and cellophane wrappers from making that crinkling sound that was the problem. I'd gorge on that after she went to bed and stuff the wrappers deep in the trash. The coke? Nah, I bought that by the case so it was always around. I got jittery when I got below two cases in the house. I would routinely drink 3 or 4 cans each evening.
So why did I give it all up and become anal about all this? Maybe it was the threat of diabetes. More likely it was the photos of myself and the fact that I sounded like I'd run a marathon after I'd tied my shoes. Now I'm loving being lean (not skinny) and toss stuff around that my 30 year old co-workers don't like to move. It's a new life. It was a long haul to get here, and it has the same cost as freedom - eternal vigilance. I can't say I love my scale, but I love that it keeps me honest.
What's your confession?
|
2048 kcal
|
Fat: 90.82g | Prot: 153.69g | Carbs: 132.98g.
Breakfast: Foremost whipping cream, Espresso Coffee, Unsalted Butter Stick. Lunch: Raspberries, Pork Chops (Top Loin, Boneless), Sugar, Foremost whipping cream, Italian Sausage. Dinner: Chicken Thigh, Tyson Foods Boneless Skinless Chicken Breasts. Snacks/Other: LeanFit Whey Protein Shake - Vanilla, MuscleTech 100% Premium Whey Protein Plus, Six Star Pro Nutrition Creatine X3, Bananas, 2% Fat Milk, British Columbia spartan apple. more...
|
|
 Comments
Wow Musician,did you ever get everyone talking!!! Love it :D Great journal entry. I can recall the reasons why I chose to get fat so many yrs ago & I can recall the reasons I chose to get rid of the fat a few yrs ago. Even tho I still have 50+ lbs to go I KNOW that it will happen. It wont happen overnight ,nor will it be miraculous but thru all my efforts to stop my old habits & all my efforts to create new habits it IS happening! I enjoy eating & feeling the food in my mouth & thats ok I can get that same sensation with healthy foods:D My temptations are still to eat whenever I want & whatever I want,just like you but I'm learning to tame them. Rather than focus on what I like about the temptations I work at remembering what I dont like about them,what they are doing to me.The harm they have caused & will cause. I can now EASILY see the time when they will no longer tempt me & with the temptation gone,so will be the desire for them because afterall its the desire that creates the temptation :D As for eating whenever I want I am discovering that I really enjoy the "lightness" my body feels when I only eat when Im truly hungry :D It far out weighs(no pun intended) the feeling to eat unrestrained.
13 Jul 15 by member: myawethinTICself
|
Truly inspirational post and comments. I have always been the "well built" one in the family, always over weight, sometimes fat. I just thought that "well built" was my lot, the way I was made. I don't think I ate too unhealthy mostly, just too much. I hate wasteing food so I would rather eat 2nds than throw it away.
I had to start cycling to work and the weight started to come off untill I realised I can be "normal" rather than "well built" this gave me more motivation on the food front and using the food and exercise diary on here is invaluable.
I have learnt that it is ok to throw food away, but I still hate it, so I try to give it away if there is too much for me or if its junk, eat a bit and pass it on. I say to my freind "do you want this? If not just take it and throw it away and don't tell me" or on one occasion I got her to go through my fridge and throw the out of date food away that I knew was there, don't worry I never ate bad food, I just started to ignore it when past its best rather than own up and throw it.
You know it sounds worse now I've written it on here, I don't think it was that bad, but owning up to my not wanting to waste food helps me realise it is probably my main issue, as well as the whole once you taste junk you want to keep eating it as long as its there, like when they get in pizza at work.
13 Jul 15 by member: pinkmoo
|
13 Jul 15 by member: Rockiesfan
|
I'm definitely a food addict, a compulsive and emotional eater. Tomorrow was always going to be the day I'd start making a change, and when I did lose weight it was temporary and I gained more. Finally after 5 stents in my heart, pre-diabetic and struggling to walk after falling off my roof something clicked in my head, don't know how else to describe it, but I knew I had to do something and the time was now (May 2014). It's a new and much better way of living....I'm now addicted to the new way and thankful for this website and the people here. A lifesaver. Great post NM, we all have so much similarity.
13 Jul 15 by member: jmb3450
|
My confession is I have turned into a DietBookOholic. I discovered Atkins in 2003 and his message hit me like a baseball bat, inspired me and I lost a lot of weight. Then after a very 'enjoyable' holiday, I wasn't so strict. I want that 'baseball bat' moment again, I have downloaded so many free and paid-for books in the hope that I will be inspired again. I now have wheat free, low carb, vegetarian, paleo, primal on my Kindle. And I sit and look through them waiting for the 'POW'.
13 Jul 15 by member: Rindaloo
|
| |
|
|
| |
Submit a Comment
You must sign in to submit a comment. Click here to sign in.
|
|
|
northernmusician's Weight History
|