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My husband and I went to visit his dying sister today. She was having a good day "for her" laying on the couch on oxygen. Her husband said we couldn't come yesterday because she was throwing tantrums and her "stomach" was very upset. I had copied 5 videos of their home town: Trieste, Italy, about 100 miles north of Venice. Even though they do not have internet, the YouTube videos that I downloaded onto my laptop played fine, and she enjoyed them immensely. She isn't up to conversation, and couldn't answer a simple question of mine, but she could relate to the videos of her hometown. With these videos her husband allowed us to stay 1 1/2 hours and almost finished the 5th video before he kicked us out. It usually takes us 3 or even 4 hours (with traffic) to drive each way, but today we made it in 2 hours there. My husband had a croissant before we left, but I didn't have anything. We had coffee there, and she cried when I was holding her, hugging before we left. It was 1:30pm when we left and we had spoke about stopping for lunch near their house before heading home. That's why I didn't eat any of the snacks I took with me: hard boiled egg and cheese. As soon as we left we talked about whether to quickly head for home to try to beat the Los Angeles traffic which gets heavy by about 2:30. We were both kind of shook up by seeing and being with his sister, so decided we could save at least 1 hour, maybe 1 ½ hours by just heading to our valley and getting through Los Angeles. We missed all the lunch specials in the valley that end at 3pm, so went to a “hole in the wall” Mexican place, near our neighborhood. I have avoided them since I started Intermittent Fasting, and trying to adjust towards Keto. I know that isn't necessary, but my favorite meal there includes a tortilla. They are “hand made” there, you can see the little old ladies in the back, patting them into circles, and are delicious. I decided that at 108 pounds, and going without a bite of food for 20 hours, I could have a splurge, so shared this giant pork burrito dish with my husband. I have no idea how many calories it was, but was full enough to be able to go without dinner. Even though my weight will go up for several days, I still feel good about my decision. Don't we all think, that hopefully, someday on maintenance we can once in a while, have an indulgence. In fact, @Miraculum suggested to me in a comment once, that perhaps I could have a “goal range” rather than just one certain weight, and I really like that idea. I think for me, I would love to have that range 105 to 110. Now, five pounds on me, is almost a size difference. So it may not work out completely, plus I am so addicted to sugar and carbs, that it might not work. But I have been saying that at some point I would like to add, maybe ½ of an apple, or something like that as “modified” Keto. A little more than a week ago I went to that “Saint Joseph's Table” spaghetti dinner, and I had a small ½ portion of spaghetti and a small pastry, and although my weight did go up for a couple days, I was still okay with my decision. So this will be trial and error. Sometimes I may blow it, like I did three weeks ago and binged on about 5 desserts in one day. That was very scary, because in the past, there were times, I fell off the wagon, and couldn't get back on for a year. But even after the binge day, the very next day, I went back on track. These last 2 times, I was okay. I think it is the Intermittent Fasting that makes the difference, which thrills me. If I can have a splurge maybe once a week, without going crazy, I think I can live with that. In about a week, when we go to one of my husband's particular doctors, we will go to lunch at the beach, and I intend to have Calamari. The breading isn't Keto, but it's the best I've had in the US. I might even have their flour-less chocolate cake. Maybe I won't have any splurge until then, and I have worked so hard. I only had wine once since November. We have been invited to my nephew's for Easter, and I will eat any entree put in front of me, rather than make a fuss. I can decline wine, bread, and dessert, which I hope I will do, but sometimes I can't resist what's in front of me. I will live through it. Maybe this IF, is truly my solution, to help me get back on track. I hear others discuss, and suggesting to others, finding a “WOE” (way of eating) they can live with. But I yo-yo dieted all my life. I don't know if I “really” can find balance in my life. Today I am okay. I'm going to go have another cup or two of herb tea.
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49.0 kg
Lost so far: 4.9 kg.
Still to go: 0 kg.
Diet followed: Reasonably Well.
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946 kcal
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Fat: 42.12g | Prot: 36.71g | Carbs: 107.24g.
Breakfast: Coffee. Lunch: Rubio's Fresh Mexican Grill Big Burrito Especial Carnitas. more...
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Losing 1.9 kg a Week
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