cinnabar's Journal

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12 February 2011

It's funny, if you ask someone who's struggling with weight what they want (an open wish list) - I wonder how many people come up with material items versus personal change.

What are some of the things on my wish list?

* To chase my children around the yard and be able to laugh while I'm doing it.
* To not have anxiety over having my picture taken.
* Arms that only wave in one place at one time.
* To not feel like an accordion when I sit down!
* To not eye a bicycle seat, saddle or airline ticket with trepidation.
* Jeans that fit - definition being ones that don't gap in the back or strain in the front.
* To put on uniform pants and not be able to see the inner lining of my front pockets. (Gals who wear them know what I mean.)
* Hot boots that will fit my calf AND my foot.
* To have a medical chart that does not contain the word "obese."
* To have just one person say, "Wow - I didn't recognize you!" And mean it in a good way. :)
* To be able to look in a mirror again, unburdened by distaste for what I see.

I think they're admirable goals, so all I can do is keep trying. When you've failed so many times before, it's so easy to say that it just isn't possible. And some days it really does feel that way.


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